erm

i wonder if... i fail...
will i be the same?
in my current state theres so much changes already...

i know these are bad thoughts...
but i already starting to give up on life...
because the light ahead is dim...
i wont end my life... i dont think i will have the guts to do so...
but i wont have the strength to continue...

maybe in the future i will forget about this feeling... this i do not know...
i am not sure will i be able to do it...
because this time, this feeling is really at it's strongest...
because i love you...

after thinking...

maybe i finally understand why i am like this...
why am i so insecure...
after so long...
i never really got any positive response from you...
none that i can be confident of...

i do not want to be like this...
but i am unable to control myself...
somebody please help me...

sensitive

i guess i really am sensitive lately... so you all should watch what you guys say especially about her... but you all wont know how i really feel... so its useless... i only can keep to myself my stupid feelings... hope i wont explode one day...

continue~

the bees in my heart can only be attracted by you...
im sensitive because im insecure
all i want is you
im scared of losing you
and until i hear your answer, i will not give up!

im sorry to those i affected because of my stupid emotions...
i meant no harm... just wanna have someone to talk to... to listen to me...

lol just remember i got this...

after so long... nearly two years im back ><

just wanna say that only You can make me this way...

maybe i'll write more later...

haiz...

a

On monday was a holiday.....Mohammad's birthday. So chunwai invite us out to watch a movie.
He plan to watch at Pavilion "Love Matters/幸福万嵗“ I think is like that write...sorry if wrong.
Waaaa..... that day keep raining.... like no stop!! Wenkang come my house 1st then my father fetch us go...
When reach there...we go to the cinema...on the way met chinhong... when reach chunwai,injune, and chengyap already there. Then hanleong,meikei and kokwai reach. Then i found out she dint come...

After buy ticket we plan to eat lunch. Other people go eat at old town... me wenkang and chengyap go eat sushi at "sakae sushi". It below the cinema only.
When we eat finish we go back cinema to wait them...then yatchun(heejing) also come at that time...

At 2.30 we meet and go in cinema to watch "Love Matters". After watch this show i can say it's a nice movie... i feel like watching it again...haha.
After finish...we go walk walk...from pavilion then walk to sungai wang... at sungai wang we meet chan hong(zhen kang)... so long no see him le... see him still ok...chat awhile then we leave le...

Dinner We go eat at a steamboat restaurant at Taman Connaught. This restaurant i come before one time...parents bring de... quite nice also and cheap...haha

We order like always...."Ying Yong" soup... When time to eat egg that time...so funny...
wenkang wan show to heejing cannot use 1 hand press pecah the egg... so he go near heejing and show him... Then he PRESS lo...and say "see cannot pecah de" THEN IT PECAH!!!! wahahahaha
It pecah because that egg fall down and crack abit edi...so when wenkang press it easy pecah... heejing face kena all.....then the egg fly towards meikei~~~ lucky she "san" if not....kena all on head... then other egg dirty...so han leong take 2 egg go wash.... he wash egg also so lembu!!! wash until 1 egg can pecah...hahaha

After eat finish we go back to the car.... still left 1 more egg.... then wenkang ask chengyap throw for wenkang catch... when wenkang almost catch.... hanleong kacau and try catch.....when catch the egg pecah!! lolz... so many egg pecah...kena hanleong hand all and his pants abit...
After that we go home le...haha...
das ehs on emoc.